


Five Stages

by palalavras



Series: Welcome to the Neighborhood [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Dogs, Neighbors, Pets, Upcycled Furniture, bark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-10
Updated: 2017-05-10
Packaged: 2018-10-29 09:55:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10851579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/palalavras/pseuds/palalavras
Summary: Where Dean is a terrible dogsitter, Cas is a terrible neighbor, Gabriel is a terrible brother, Sam is a terrible judge of character, and Ruby is a terrible dog.(But it all works out in the end.)





	Five Stages

Castiel was propped in a discount lawn chair on his back porch sipping tonic water when he heard a shuffle and screen door slam from the neighbor whose backyard abutted his own.    
   
“I can't believe Sammy didn't plan better. Listen, I get that he’s a hot shot lawyer man but you’d think— No, I’m not letting a dog get the better of me! Yeah, Sam said the pound thought she was a pure bred because of her coat and all but I’m really starting to doubt a damn thing he said. I can’t believe she out puppy-eyed the queen of puppy eyes. Yeah, no, I know. Yeah you, too. Bye, Bobby.”    
   
The not-Sam stranger sighed heavily in his oddly catching voice. Cas imagined he was wiping a hand across his face in frustration.    
   
Cas had met Sam 6 months prior when Sam had first moved in. Like the polite and courteous man he was raised to be, and the only traits he gladly carried from childhood, he had trudged around the corner to knock on his new neighbor’s door. He still couldn’t stop his mother’s voice judging him, _why didn’t you bring him a housewarming gift? I thought I raised you better._ He had ignored her then, like he had the last ten years.  
   
Gabriel had once told him if he didn’t eat his vegetables, the Jolly Green Giant would carry him away in his sleep. Of course, he didn’t believe that was a possibility until Sam opened the door and Cas had to squint in a vaguely heavenly direction to find his face. He was suddenly overcome by a concern that he had not eaten asparagus since living in his mother's home: a fear he never thought he'd experience. Sam, luckily, was kind and there was no mention of vegetables. In fact, he had the kind of face Gabriel might describe as leading to "a bleeding heart".  
   
As a tall, well spoken, educated man who preferred white t-shirts and faded jeans, flaunted a level of Fabio hair that Cas could never hope to achieve, and adopted a rescue dog, the women of the neighborhood looked at him as if they were just waiting for their husbands to leave town. God help them all if he ever decided to mow the lawn shirtless or worse, save a small animal from oncoming traffic.   
   
In fact, he’d had the misfortune of being captive audience to his elderly widowed neighbor who waxed poetic about “that young man’s rump” who really “ruffled her feathers”. Castiel really, really did not want to know more. But he did. She told him not to be jealous, there was room for him in the beehive, too. He reminded her that the nursing home in Valley Hill had plenty of bachelors and turned on his heel before she could slap the mail out of his hands.    
   
Ignoring the gaggle of Hester Lane Harlots, as Gabriel dubbed them, Sam by all accounts had been an excellent neighbor. About a month ago, Sam had brought home Ruby.    
   
Now Cas heard Ruby sniffing along the fence while her babysitter finished up the call with Bobby. Cas was curious if Sam’s friend was equally as objectively appealing as Sam. For purely educational reasons.  
   
“Ruby, come on inside, I’ll get you fed.”  
   
He heard a door shut but the mystery remained.

 

***

 

Two days later Cas was in a different but equally shabby chair, grading term papers at his garage-sale acquired outdoor table. Spring was still putting in a valiant effort before the suffocating summer heat rolled in. A breeze ruffled his papers but not so loudly as to cover the return of not-Sam and his ongoing aria with Ruby.  
   
“Dammit Samantha! Just like Sammy to get a dog that DOESN'T LISTE— GET OVER HERE! I just let you out and you decided to come back in to poop on Sammy’s rug? You know he’s going to blame me. No. No, you stay out here until you do your business.”  
   
There was only an eager _bark!_ in response.

 

***

 

“No— don't you bark! NO! For the love of— if you stop I’ll give you a treat!”  
   
There was a loaded pause followed by a singular happy _woof!_ He could feel more than hear the exasperated, near panic that clashed with the lazy Saturday breeze wafting through the neighborhood.  
   
The frantic shuffling of man and beast stopped where Cas had been patching a loose slat.  
   
“Hiya, you must be Sam's neighbor. Cas, right?” A pair of very green eyes in a stubbled face appeared over the fence.    
   
Was the contract on the house that only exceptionally good looking people and dogs could live there?    
   
“Oh uh yes. Cas... Castiel Novak.”  
   
“Nice to meet you, Cas. I’m Dean. Sam’s big brother.” Dean wedged his shoulder over the fence and offered a calloused hand which he managed to shake as least awkwardly as possible with the weird angle.

"And unwilling dogsitter.”  
   
Dean laughed sheepishly, moving a hand to the back of his neck. “Yeah I guess you’ve heard the fighting. Sorry about that.”  
   
“Actually, if you’re interested, I have warehouse sized bag of specialty dog treats that might occupy her.”  
   
“Yeah, man, that would be great! You have dogs?”  
   
“No.”  
   
“Oh.”  
   
“My brother sent me a twenty pound bag of dog treats as congratulations on my tenure.”  
   
“Huh?”  
   
“His warped idea of humor and an Amazon prime membership. The note said ‘top treats for my top dog’.”  
   
Dean squinted at him. “I’m not sure whether to laugh or ask if he’s been checked out.”  
   
Cas laughed and replied, “You would be surprised how often that’s used to describe him.”  
   
Dean grinned at him.  
   
“But anyway, if you would like the dog treats, I can drop them off now or tomorrow afternoon.”  
   
“Dude, that would be awesome! I have to be at the garage in just a few but how about same time tomorrow? I can snag some of Sam’s fancy beer as repayment.”  
   
“Perfect, I’ll be by tomorrow.”  
   
“See you then, Cas.”  
   
“Goodbye, Dean.” Dean smiled as he turned away from the fence and back towards the house, presumably to wrangle Ruby who had been eyeing a squirrel.

 

***

 

The day had turned sweltering and stagnant, just in time for sweat to start beading on his lower back as he turned the corner to Sam’s. Cas nervously smoothed down his slacks again, as best he could lugging the promised bag of “Special Holiday Edition DreamStick Dog Treats”. It felt... heavier. Had the bag gained mass along with his shame?  
   
Dean swung the door open just he knocked.  
   
“Hey, man, let me get that for you.”    
   
“Thank you.” They both struggled briefly before Dean managed to heft it over his shoulder. He was nearly off balanced by the red retriever suddenly wedged between his legs.  
   
“Some watch dog you are! Trying to kill me?” He complained as Ruby sniffed Cas happily. Cas did not grimace guiltily.  
   
“Well come on inside. Want a beer? Though you deserve a lot more for saving my ass.”  
   
“Yes, thank you Dean. That sounds great.”  
   
Dean pointed him toward a well loved sofa where Ruby suddenly sat panting on a large area carpet. All that was left was a fresh baked pie and an artfully strewn pair of shoes and it would be a Better Homes and Gardens spread. Come to think of it, didn’t Sam have an herb garden?  
   
“Oh shit, I was supposed to water that too.” Dean cursed from the kitchen. There was a thump that signaled Castiel’s release from Gabriel’s unfortunate gift.  
   
“Here,” Dean said, passing Cas a beer and coming round to join him.  
   
“The TV is normally here but Sam’s into all the feng shui and something about summer solstice so…”  
   
“We have great view of the dying herb garden,” Castiel smirked.  
   
Dean colored and lifted the drink to his mouth to stifle his mumbling.  
   
“I do have to thank you for taking the dog food off my hands, I would never have been able to deplete my apocalypse size stock.”  
   
“I saw the bag had been opened. You been eating dog food? Fallen on hard times?”  
   
Castiel laughed. “Sometimes it feels that way. I’ve tried to donate treats to… local dogs but owners generally don’t take kindly to strange men feeding their pets.”  
   
Ruby barked from her perch, unsatisfied with the lack of attention.  
   
“Ruby, come here.”  
   
Ruby pried herself off the rug and wandered in the distinctly opposite direction.  
   
“Son of a… Get back here so I can love you!”  
   
“Did you and Sam live in different parts of the US? I notice you have different accents.”  
   
“Yeah and he’s a sasquatch…but yeah, we grew up in Lawrence and traveled a lot as kids. Sam went out to California for college and I moved back to Lawrence. For a job and a girl I guess. Sam needed a change and well, I did too. Followed the moose out here.”  
   
“Ironically my brother too followed me out here in search for some life changes. And he still sleeps on my couch from time to time, even if objectively his home is much nicer than mine.”  
   
“Younger brothers, am I right?”  
   
“Actually Gabriel is 10 years older than me.”  
   
“What?! The same Gabe with the dog treats and the couch surfing?” Dean turned bodily on his cushion to stare at Castiel.  
   
“The very same. He is a man child, I can assure you.”  
   
“Well maybe he and Sam can get together and annoy each other instead of us. Two big kids.”  
   
“Yes, just have Sam lure him with candy.”  
   
“Sam would only buy chocolate if it’s some artisan free range organic crap that costs five bucks a bar and was harvested under the full moon.”  
   
“Well Gabriel does have a taste for the finer things in life, at least he tells me as much when he sleeps on my recycled couch. Then of course I remind him my less-than-fine couch cushion can still smother him in his sleep.”  
   
Dean barked out a laugh. “You’re my kind of guy. Maybe I can finally even the stakes against Sam and his girlfriend.”  
   
“Oh? I didn’t know Sam was dating someone.”  
   
“Oh. Uh. Ruby. The dog. I mean, not literally.”  
   
“I suppose I’m a little surprised he’s a bachelor. I’ve been an… unfortunate witness to the cougars in the neighborhood.”  
   
“Frankly— don’t tell him I said this— Sam has terrible taste in women. I think he’s taking a break to rethink his choices. He used to want the whole apple pie life, white picket fence and all, but I don’t think that’s him anymore. I mean, he does have a dog but… well, you’ve met her.” He grimaced towards the dog who was currently eating part of the area rug. For...fiber? Cas was suddenly incredibly grateful his only pet, a carnival goldfish, had passed some months ago. Although as with most disasters, he expected his brother was involved. He swore that Gabriel might have tried to get Goldie drunk, no matter how he may try to deny it. Empty Coors Light cans don't just appear next to your pet's tank.

"What about you? Do you desire the ‘apple pie life’?” Gabriel often said he was terrible at small talk, "got to let the cookies cool before you pop them in your mouth, Cassie", but he had difficulty taking advice from a Gremlin who spoke mainly in TV references and was sleeping with his boss.  
   
“What is this, Dr. Phil?” Dean countered.  
   
“I can sit on a stool if that will make you feel more comfortable.”

Dean smiled at his lap then started to pick at the soggy label when he replied, “I do—or did—want that life. Some things happened with my job and I didn’t want to put anyone in that kind of danger so I just forgot about it. Right now it’s just us. And Ruby.” He added, when a indignant woof came from behind the sofa.    
   
Green eyes focused on him.  “What about you, Cas? Lady luck been smiling on you?”  
   
“You could say my last relationship was so disastrous that I moved clear across the country when it fell apart. It appears Sam and I have equally terrible taste in partners.”  
   
“Well. You’re free to join our bachelor team. Less pie but more free will.” He gestured to the general expanse of Sam's living room.  
   
“I appreciate the offer and expect my VIP card in the mail. You do know where I live.”  
   
Dean smiled towards his lap and they sat in comfortable silence for a moment.  
   
Ruby appeared suddenly by Castiel’s leg and rested her head on his knee. When ear scratches apparently weren’t enough, she jumped halfway into his lap and started barking at his face.  
   
“Woah hey Ruby, get down!” Dean apologized as he dragged the dog from his lap.  
   
“It’s no trouble. That’s probably my cue to go. I’m sure I have at least a dozen panicked emails from my procrastinating students.” He headed towards the front door.  
   
“Well Cas, it was—Ruby, GET—" Dean pushed at her with a socked foot as she wedged her head through the cracked door as if to follow him out. A deep kinship with Cas? Or a desperate bid for freedom? Dean finally insinuated himself between Ruby and the front door.    
   
“Well, Cas, it was nice to meet you.”  
   
“Likewise, Dean. I hope we see each other again soon.”

They smiled at each other before Dean shut the door with a click. He walked lightly back to his home, the oppressive heat not so unbearable as before.

 

***

 

“Well, Ruby, we done good. I made a new friend, you didn’t kill that squirrel, no one can tell that you pooped in the house, and Sam will be home tomorrow. Then you, me, Sam, and Cas can all have a party. Won’t that be fun?”  
   
Ruby’s collar jingled as if someone were petting her aggressively.    
   
 

 

_Epilogue_

  
Cas was on his back porch reading when he heard Sam's familiar voice through the fence.  
   
“Ruby come here. Good girl! I missed you! What are you barking at?” His tone moved from babying to reproachful.  
   
“Have you put on weight? I don't know why this keeps happening. We'll have to put you back on the puppy diet.”  
   
Ruby woofed happily, unaware of her fate.  
   
Maybe one day he’d explain to Dean and Sam that in an attempt to deplete Gabriel’s gift, he had for weeks been dropping treats over the fence to the only willing accomplice (who, he might add, was terrible at feigning innocence).  
   
Cas very quietly retreated into the unjudging safety of his home before Ruby could give him away.  
 

  
_fin_

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> In this imagining, Ruby is a [red golden retriever](http://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/ec/5a/1b/ec5a1b12cb9524f9e8cc0c1c23a1c96e.jpg). This was inspired by the true events of my terrible puppers and the sadly untrue events of me befriending my handsome neighbors. This is my first official FF, I hope you enjoyed!
> 
> Fun fact: This title comes from the “Kubler Ross Model” or the five stages of grief. There is an excellent Robot Chicken clip that demonstrates this, [involving a giraffe](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_Z3lmidmrY).


End file.
